We were all seated around a kitchen table talking. The group was filled with men and it was designed to be a place where we could express challenges in a safe place. We had made it around the table and the last person was sharing what a challenging year it has been for him.
He talked about the inequality of the area he lived. He talked about the fairness of the system and the lack of diversity he saw in front of him. And he expressed his frustration with it all. He was sincere and passionate.
And you know what? He was right.
He was not just complaining for the sake of it. The area was devoid of diversity. The challenges he mentioned were real. That’s why the group exists. It allows for a place where these discussions can happen. It’s not blasted all over social media. It’s just a group of people that want to support each other.
He was right. It wasn’t fair. But after the dust settles and all of the grievances were filed. There is one question to ask if we want to move forward.
So what? What will you do about it?
Life is not fair. So what?
The area lacks diversity. So what?
I don’t write this to be insensitive. The issues are real. But at the end of the day, most of them are not things he (or I) can do anything about…especially in the short term. We can’t control them. We can only control how we react to our circumstances. The best thing we can do in any situation is to chart the path we want to go…and do work each day to move toward it.
You won’t get there today. Hell…you won’t get there tomorrow. But you can make a bit of progress today…and that’s enough.
There will be setbacks, roadblocks, injustices, and frustrations.
Life is not fair. So what?
You got this.
